I haven’t changed a damn bit in the last couples years, have I? I fall for the same thing, over and and over again. I play with fire, get burned. Try again, get burned. The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over again and expecting different results.
The first one, thats a whole ‘nother story that I’d rather not get involved with. Senior year was gonna end bad, Prom was gonna be lonely, and all the rumors going around about what happened before Christmas with my first Girlfriend. And then she just shows up, seeming out of no where. I fall for her hard and fast, ask her to prom a week after meeting her. Ask her out two days before Prom and had a romantic ending to senior year. That lasted long, but should have known religion would rear its ugly head. I tried, but It crashed and burned hard, making the start of 2010 unbearable. And then what do I do? Go back to the first one for a few months. I never learn.
Okay, start of the new school year, second year in college. One day, about week into the semester, go by an old friend and some random girl, didn’t know her. Showed them a magic trick, she freaked. Spent nearly half an hour trying to show her how I did it. Stayed late that night since a friend left a backpack at school, waiting for him to show up. She was there. Kept talking, a lot that night. She gave me her number with out even me having to ask. Started talking on the phone, texting, hanging out in school, a week to the day, I was at school from 9 in the morning til 10:30 at night. The entire day, when we weren’t in class, we were together, talking, hanging out, playing card games, going to the movie club, and after a while we just broke off by ourselves and played “2 truths and lie” for about an hour until dirty looks from the janitorial staff forced us to leave. Ended up at her place in my car continuing our little game until it ended up with us kissing. The next week, it was making out at school, and even though I was warned about her past, didn’t listen. Next week, she was distant, and I asked her if she wants to date or not. She tells me she needs to “find herself” so I backed off. next week, there she is, making out with some guy who she’d eventually date. No harm, no foul I guess. Lets just say it stung, but to this day, do to circumstances that I know and not saying, I can’t hate her. Besides, we never dated, so she had no obligation.
So, what do I after that? Me and my first ex spent a lot of time together after that. Around my birthday 2011, what ever we had we decided to stop hanging out, and best be for the the both of us. So, flash forward to the start of the summer, and this girl messages me on facebook, says she saw me at school. A tad creepy, but shes cute and seems harmless. Start to talk, flirt, and we meet at place of employment. Meet her parents at Bartlett fest, and start to secretly date behind her parents backs. School starts, and everything is going fine. Everyone seems to like her. We had to be sneaky about getting some alone time just so we could be together. Sucks, but thats what you gotta do sometimes. But something always seemed off. She starts being distant, we start fighting, and before you know it, were done. 3 months. Two days later, I get some disturbing news from a friend. She was making out with someone the day before the convo, which would mean the day after. And the day of, told this girl in private she was talking to someone about dating him while still with me. She goes from me to a stonner. Great. So they date for a few months, but I know she is cheating on him with which now is her current boyfriend. I called him out on it, and he didn’t deny it. Last day of the semester before winter break, I was texting her, being courteous because thats who I am. She is complains about how her second BF treats her like shit. I snap. Hard. Call her and leave her a voicemail, saying I know she was talking to (insert name A) while dating me, and had sex with (Insert name B) while she was still with him. Suffice to say, other than the occasional small talk that she always starts, the only two words I’ve even said to her has been “Happy Birthday”
After my best friend and I decided trying to date would be the best option, and that failed (all my fault on this one) and that was early January, alas another year alone on Valentines Day and my birthday. Flash forward to this week, I meet a girl at school and we start talking. Wait a second, this seems like its happened before. once again, manage to get her number with out trying and its been back and forth flirting for the last couple days. What the hell is wrong with me? You’d think after letting 3 girls, 2 of which I dated after knowing them a month and I’m doing it again? What in the hell is wrong with me?